Wednesday, 29 August 2018

"This too shall pass..."

It has been ages since I last felt the twinkle of a post starting to form in my brain.  I guess this has mostly been to me working a bit more - brain full of work instead of kids and home, and then tired brain not wanting to think of anything! But here I am again!

 I've just read over all the blogs I've written so far - it really is lovely to see how far the girls have come, and it really does solidify in my head that this (homeschooling / unschooling) approach to life and learning is the right one for us.  Yes I still have days where I doubt it - doesn't everyone doubt things sometimes?  And yes I have days where I think 8 hours of time at home on my own, or available to work, would be nice.  But then something pops up and shuts down the doubts and little voices.

I was listening to a pod cast about unschooling the other day and the lady talking was in the USA.  She was talking about all the different reasons that people she knew chose to homeschool. One of the most common reasons given was family time and knowing their children.  People commonly felt that when their kids leave home at 6 or 7 in the morning and don't come home until 5 in the evening, when they finish high school and head off to college they felt like they hardly knew them.  I love that homeschooling gives me the opportunity to feel like I really know my girls.  Even if I don't get to sit and watch Netflix on my own, like ever!

So where are we now?  Miss M is almost 5, Miss F is almost 3.  And for all the parents out there struggling with the 1 - 4 age group, whether there's one kid in there or more, IT GETS EASIER! Or at least it did for me.  Not sure if it has to do with Miss M being on the spectrum (ASD) or not.  But oh wow has she calmed down a lot! Things are smoother, mostly.  Yes there is attitude, but it's kind of entertaining.  I don't mind when she sounds like a grumpy, sarcastic, full-of-attitude version of myself.  Its so much easier than the freaked out, not coping, melt downs of her 3 year old self.

From having months of in house routine and not many commitments with the outside world we have blossomed into a busy homeschooling family with things on option most days - park, bike rides, brunch dates, play dates, bush walks, shopping, errands, playgroup, ballet, gymnastics etc.  Some days we still choose a quiet home day (like today, and yesterday, and the day before...), but some weeks we are out every day.  It is all played by ear and depends what the girls want to do.

When we do go out we often connect with a lovely local group of homeschoolers and do a range of different activities - skatepark, playing in the mud somewhere, bush walks, indoor playcenters, whatever is going.  It's lovely to see the kids of all ages include each other and play random, made up games together, no one gets left out, even the youngest kids are included.

When we stay in we do whatever the girls want to do.  Some days that is iPads or movies all day.  Some days are spent in the back yard.  I just become "yes" mum.  Miss 4 is very much in crafting and will often come up with random things to make or activities to do.  A favourite lately is mixing paint - she doesn't actually want to paint anything, just mix the paint to make different colours.

Today is an iPad and netflix day.  Yesterday was a craft day - we played with air drying clay and watched youtube videos of people using pottery wheels, and drew pictures, and did colouring in.  Tomorrow is a day of outings and events.

Miss M (4) is loving numbers still.  When we go for drives out and about the girls love to yell out when they see a "number sign" (speed sign) and are both learning which numbers are called what, and which is higher or lower than the previous sign.  We are currently growing carrot tops in some cotton wool, every morning we measure how big they are and write it down and see how much they have grown.  Writing is still a challenge for Miss M, but she is slowing getting interested.  Miss F is all about letters and what noises we make for them.


My previous frustrations with bedtimes have, mostly, resolved. Very thankful for that! We have kept a very relaxed bedtime routine.  When one looks tired we offer bed and a cuddle and a book, while the other keeps playing quietly at whatever takes their interest.  Some nights they are both asleep by 8.30, sometimes they are still up at 10.30.  But it is, almost, always calmer that it used to be.  I don't yell, or get angry, we just plod through the evening and what will be will be.  We are slowly releasing all the rules we used to have around bedtime, and replacing them with an opportunity for the girls to figure out their own needs and learn what their bodies are saying to them.  This is still a work in progress.

Bring on a different day every day, while still being the same.

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